How much can you get for breaking and entering?

So, today I had to drop off a package at the home of a business associate. He told me if no one was home to just open the unlocked front door and put it on the foyer table. Oh, and that I shouldn’t mind the dog as he was all bark and no bite. I’ve been to his house before and whipped in there in a hurry mid-afternoon to find that no one was home. The front door was locked, so I sauntered around to the back to leave the package in a place where it wouldn’t get wet from the impending rain. When I got to the backyard, the garage door was up, so I just placed the package on the step by the back door inside the garage. And he was right; the dog got up out of his crate, gave me one big sniff and proceeded to lick my hand. The cat on top of the SUV barely blinked at me. I went back to work and sent my associate an email letting him know that he didn’t need to look for any of my toes and fingers in his garage tonight as neither his dog in the crate nor the cat cared that I was on the premises. And he sent me back a message saying thanks, but he doesn’t have a dog in a crate. Or a cat.


And that’s how I met his neighbor a block away in a very similar looking house when I frantically drove back there to fess up for traipsing through his garage and to apologize. And wouldn’t you know, the first thing out of his mouth was, “Don’t I know you? Aren’t you that lady who works for the power company?” Aye, yi, yi. Fortunately, he had a good sense of humor.

If anyone comes looking for me, I’ll be the one in the black dress with the brown paper bag over my head.