Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Fa La La La La

You better get all prayed up, brothers and sisters, 'cause hell is freezin' over. I went shopping yesterday and found three, count 'em, THREE, pairs of jeans that fit well. Of course, I had to try on eighteen pair, but nevertheless I found three pairs of jeans I really liked. It's a dadgum miracle. Buying jeans is right up there with buying bras and bathing suits. I'd rather get jabbed in the eye with a red hot poker than try them on. And don't even get me started about the lack of comfortable, well made pantries for women who fall somewhere between hoochie mama thong and granny panty. You just can't find a good panty these days. I was beginning to think it was just me, and then I struck up a conversation with a 40-something stranger at the underwear clearance rack at Wal-Mart who was complaining about the same thing. I felt much better about myself afterwards. However, a couple of minutes later when I was squatted in the floor looking for my size in the Hanes cotton low rise briefs, I witnessed her nearly get into a fight with a lady who walked up to her and said, "Karen told me at the cookout you wanted to whoop my a**." And then the other lady said, "Noooo, I said I didn't want to be around your a**." They went back and forth with some attitude, and there was some ugliness tossed around about panty lady's recent stint in jail, so perhaps she hasn't always made the best choices. However, I do not believe that incarceration should affect your ability to judge a good panty, so I still feel confident I'm not alone in my frustration to find adequate drawers for the middle aged woman. By the way, the police were called to that little catfight before it got out of hand, so I slipped around the corner and down to the grocery department before I witnessed something I had to testify to in court. That was two days before Christmas. So much for peace, love and kindness for your fellow man.

Teen Angel and I spent yesterday shopping. We didn't buy much because the sales were somewhere between fair to middlin'. I saw better buys before Christmas, but we did find a few bargains, and I scored big time on some capris for our upcoming cruise. Plus, we had some tasty Chick-Fil-A and good conversation. All was right with the world. It was a nice way to wrap up the holidays.

Christmas was good. All was calm, and all was bright. That's not always the case with Hubby's family, so we considered it a successful holiday. Santa was better to us than he should have been, but he didn't get too carried away. I got a new rolling hard case which holds all of my cameras, lenses and photography gear. No more lugging around three backpacks. Also, I got a new suitcase with 360 degree wheels. I can't tell you how excited I am about that. That one made it on my wish list this year after Teen Angel and I lugged our suitcases across Europe, up and down steps in buildings without elevators and across crowded airports last August. Exhausted, we were sitting at the airport in Paris for our flight home, when a lady in high heels went gliding by us with her spinner suitcase, pushing it effortlessly and acting like it was the easiest thing in the world. I looked at Teen Angel, pointed at her suitcase and said, "I'm gettin' me some of that." Besides, I needed a new suitcase anyway. Hours later, when we picked up our luggage in Dallas to go through customs, mine wouldn't roll right, and it was like draggin' a dog without legs on a leash. I finally stopped and looked at it and realized that one whole corner, wheel and all, was busted off that bag. I didn't know whether to thank the baggage handlers at Charles DeGaulle or Dallas International. I had to drag that heavy thing through customs, recheck it and drag it through the Nashville Airport with one wheel. It was a joy, I tell ya'. On the bright side, the bottle of French red wine we had shoved down in the middle of the bag made it through both flights in one piece. Salute!

I'll get to use that new suitcase in a couple of weeks when Hubby and I take off for Mexico. We are taking a cruise with several of my cousins and their spouses, and it should be fun, fun, fun. There are a million things to do between now and then to make sure that Papa T., the diabetic dog and Teen Angel are all taken care of while we're gone. We are spending one night in New Orleans before our ship leaves port, and it should be interesting. That happens to be the night before the LSU-Alabama BCA Championship football game. Every redneck in the southeast will be in NOLA, trolling Bourbon Street. I told Hubby it should either be very exciting or a good opportunity to get in the middle of some kind of street fight. You know us, we seem to find excitement wherever we go. I better where my clean underwear incase I'm in some sort of accident. Let's hope I find some decent new drawers before we go.


oreneta said...

You're right, 3 pairs of jeans is a miracle. I'm happy to find that in 5 years.

Trailboss said...

I'm right up there on the panty thing. Jeans too. Funny that I don't remember having that problem when I was in my 20's. UGH!

J.G. said...

I feel your pain on the panty thing, and let's don't even talk about jeans -- I have been driven to the alterations shop to get the hip/waist ratio right.

Have you tried Barely There high cuts? When I found them I bought out the store in my size. One Hanes Place has them online for cheap, too.

Oh, and stay away from Karen. She sounds like trouble.