Good Eats

The Hula's are incapable of picking a restaurant on the spur of the moment if there are more than two of us in the car. It requires an act of congress, peace negotiations and a round of rock, paper, scissors in order to settle on a place to eat. Every time we eat out on the weekend, it's an ordeal just to find a restaurant. When it's just me, Teen Angel and Hubby, we literally have to take turns picking a place, but even that system isn't foolproof. We just spent two days shopping in a nearby big city with the rest of the Hula's and spent roughly 40% of our time finding restaurants. Papa T. wants to eat at Cracker Barrel...three times a day...and pouts if he doesn't get it. Teen Angel wants unusual stuff that no one else does like squid and sushi. The rest of us fall somewhere in between, but we have to factor in my colon's intolerance to grease, Mama J.'s need for (massive amounts of) fiber and Hubby's love of beef. We never seem to agree on the same place at the same time. To make things worse, Mama J. wants to worry about a meal six hours before the meal, cranking up our angst early. We'd probably be better off if we just pulled into a Piggly Wiggly and bought a tube of bologna and a box of crackers.

We had been on the road five minutes Wednesday when we discovered that only one person in the car (me) had eaten breakfast and that we should probably eat a meal to avoid everyone being cranky during morning rush traffic at our shopping destination. So, only twelve minutes into our trip we eased into the nearest Cracker Barrel. We all winked at each other, hoping this would get Papa T.'s Cracker Barrel fix out of the way for the rest of the trip. What does the bible say? Pride goeth before a fall? A snack here or there helped us through the rest of the day, and we didn't eat a meal again until around 7pm. Apparently, the was the time all of the other shoppers decided to eat, too because every restaurant we stopped at had a 45 minute wait. We debated Fridays, Texas Roadhouse and all of the other usual suspects. We cussed, fussed and discussed it until we ended up at a Golden Corral buffet. The meal was fine, but we were exhausted from all the effort leading up to it. We repeated this process several times during the rest of the trip with the tension culminating Thursday evening at the Cheesecake Factory. It was at the mall we were visiting, and Sissy and I thought it would be easier on everyone if we just made a reservation there, shopped until our meal time, ate there and saved a repeat of the night before. Well, that didn't work either. It all started when Papa T. decided he couldn't eat there because he doesn't like cheesecake. More cussin', fussin' and discussion lead to three different changes in our plans. We ended up eating at the the Cheesecake Factory after all. We still had a forty minute wait, and we ended up with a booth and not a table, which is not good for Mama J. because she can't get out of a booth once she gets down in it. It was too dark in there for Papa T.'s one good eye. Sissy read the menu to him, but in a childish act of defiance, he pitifully asked if they had grilled cheese, crossed his arms and said, "that's all I want". Senility is such fun.

After our Florida trip this summer, we decided that spending a week out of state was just too hard on Hubby's folks. After this week, we've decided that two days out of state is too hard on them, too. It's gonna take a little while to recover from this little trip. They wanted to go out and eat last night, but we took a pass because we didn't have the energy. Good thing. Sissy had to take them to Cracker Barrel. God bless her.