Just ignore the edits in red. The first draft was a little wordy
Once upon a time a 40 something mom the beautiful Queen Hula ruled her kingdom with threats and impatience great wisdom and strength. She was despised adored by her teenaged daughter all and exhausted admired by the rest of the family for her beauty. Her peeps subjects wanted to wear her out honor her for yet another weekend her hard work by having her work her tail off giving her a special gift befitting of a royal leader. They decided to move her sister-in-law on a great spa package from a city five hours away in a nearby kingdom. Mom Queen Hula was numb delighted when she heard the news and hurriedly put her old work clothes favorite pieces of the royal wardrobe into a the first duffle bag she could find hand tooled leather bag. “What a crock of crap wonderful weekend this will be,” she exclaimed. On that Friday afternoon, she took a nap so she could stay awake later paced the floor in anticipation of the ride to the spa. Because she couldn’t get off work had some royal business to attend to, she couldn’t leave for her long a$$ drive spa retreat until that evening. Around 8pm she dragged climbed into her minivan carriage and rode 300 miles the short distance to a big, dirty city the nearby kingdom. In no time at all, she collapsed on the couch was tucked into a soft, downy bed, dreaming of all the crap beauty treatments she would have to load receive the next day.
The following morning she was rolled off the couch awakened by the loud mouth gentle voice of her no-good husband a handsome footman and dragged led from room to room for one chore beauty treatment after another. She scarfed down dined on a Valu Meal six course dinner of nuggets and fries only the finest and most expensive foods before collapsing retiring to her couch private room for a brief nap long slumber. Arising just a few hours later for a quick leisurely breakfast of Krispy Kremes Raspberry crepes, she dressed in her ragged old jeans royal robes and slinked into boarded her minivan carriage for the never ending thrilling ride home.
Back at home the castle, she was glad sorry that her moving experience weekend retreat had ended finally so quickly but groaned basked in the knowledge that she was due back at work the next morning loved and appreciated by all her royal subjects and that she would never get had been given a wonderful gift of rest and relaxation. The end.
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