Thursday, March 27, 2008

Boxing Springs

I’ve talked in my sleep for years. Apparently, I don’t squeeze in enough words during the daylight hours and have to ramble throughout the night to catch. No surprise there, right? I’ve been known to twitch a little and flail my legs occasionally. But I’ve never walked in my sleep, gotten up and eaten something out of the fridge or tried to beat up someone while asleep…until last night.

I sleep soundly. Really. Soundly. As in a tornado could roll through the middle of our house, and I wouldn’t notice. Tornadoes rolling through our home in the middle of the night are a real possibility in this part of the country so the weather radio sits on the nightstand right by my head. Anyway, I was in a deep, deep sleep last night when I started dreaming that a serial killer was sneaking up on me to attack me. (I’m such a drama queen, even in my sleep.) In the dream, I pretended I didn’t know he was there and waited until his hands were starting to close around my neck before I started fighting back. I smashed his nose with a right jab, and hit his chin with a left uppercut. Only problem is that I was really swinging, and I did it just as Hubby rolled over and laid his arm across my waist. If he hadn’t have moved quickly, I would have Sugar Rayed him to the other side of the Posturpedic. I don’t know if it was the dream or the movement, but I woke up to find myself kicking and swinging both arms with all my strength. Hubby was stunned to say the least, and so was the dog that jumped up from his spot at the end of the bed and started running for cover. I came within a hair of punching Hubby in the face. When I stopped I was wide awake and stunned. I couldn’t believe what I had done. Fortunately, Hubby was so tired he shrugged it off and went right back to sleep. However, I laid in the dark for a long time wondering how I could be so out of control and cursing myself for spending time on the internet because in my dream my attacker looked like this.

A little BraBABY karma perhaps?


Queen of the Mayhem said...

I talk in my sleep all the time! Mr. Mayhem has told me he can hear me correct students ALL NIGHT LONG!

I feel your pain on the drama queen thing....we might have been separated at BIRTH! :)

oreneta said...

Oh my goodness gracious, that was hilarious, your poor husband! And you. What a weird dream. I walked around once when I was a kid, but that is about it as far as I know.

Jason said...


Once in the middle of the night I caught my little brother sleep walking in the kitchen, in front of the open fridge, with his pants down, getting ready to relieve himself. Luckily, I stopped him just in time. At least you didn't pee in the fridge. I think that would have been worse.

Amy said...

"At least you didn't pee in the fridge. I think that would have been worse."

Jason makes a really good point!:)

Have a great weekend, Hula Girl!


janjanmom said...

Websearch for scary pictures could induce sleep fighting. I think you could totally get a grant to research that!