Sunday, January 3, 2010

Fun Monday-2010

I haven't taken part in Fun Monday for a while for a variety of reasons, but I thought I'd jump in this week since the lovely Mariposa, who is always so good to host Fun Monday on a regular basis, made a point to invite me. Besides, I needed a little inspiration for a topic. I've been on vacation since December 24th, and I think my brain has trickled out of my right ear and onto the floor. Marisposa wants to know what we're looking forward to in 2010. Easy enough. Or is it?

2009 was a rough year for the Hula-gen's thanks to an unexpected death and the dysfunction we like to call Hubby's family. I normally don't wish away time, but frankly, I was glad to turn loose of 2009. She was a b**** with an attitude. I'm hoping 2010 is a lot kinder to us.

I don't have a particular event I'm looking forward to this new year, and I didn't really make any resolutions. I simply resolve to be. To be still and listen more often. To be quiet when I want to speak but shouldn't. And to focus on one day at a time. That all sounds simple, but it's much easier said than done. The drama of 2009 taught me that life is going to stink on a regular basis, and we just have to roll with it. People are going to get sick. Loved ones are going to die. Money may be short, as well as our time. I have found peace of mind only by choosing not to look too far into the future and by savoring the minutes and hours that make up each day.

Frankly, it's hard to think about what could lay ahead for us this year. Papa T.'s health is sliding fast. I haven't really blogged about it much because my family seeks privacy on this issue, but I could literally blog every day about the wickedness of dementia and the way it tears the mind apart. The forgetfulness, the agitated moods, the incontinence. The fingers of this disease touch every part of the being, and it is exhausting trying to take care of Papa T. I knew Sissy's death would accelerate his health problems, and boy has it. For once, I don't like being right. I think this year will bring some importance and difficult decisions about his care. For now, we will keep puttering along and face each issue as it arises.

The year will bring joy, too. Teen Angel will begin her senior year of high school in the fall. I can't believe my baby is seventeen, and I can't believe we will likely be empty nesters soon. She is maturing into a beautiful young woman and aside from those 2.3 seconds every day that I want to pinch her head off, she makes us proud in many ways.

I look forward to running more. I didn't really make a resolution regarding my running, other than to keep a running log. I'm going to use it to look for trends and get a handle on the things I'm doing wrong and the things I'm doing right. I will never be fast. My form will never be pretty, but I can be consistent and keep my body healthy. (I could be a tiny bit faster, if I'd make myself do some intervals.) And I plan to give some serious thought to the Nashville or Memphis half marathons this year. It all depends on how crazy our lives are. I saw an ad for the National Guard at the theater yesterday that featured the motto "Failure is not an Option". I like that. I need something to use as a mantra to keep my mind right when I'm running, and I've decided to use that. It's either that or "Don't Stop". Perhaps that should be my motto for the year, "Don't Stop". Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and face each day as it comes. Oh, and I might take a few pictures along the way.

10 comments:

Mariposa said...

I LOVE this post. Very candid, very honest and very meaningful. I have also stopped making resolutions, but I try to make my list of good intentions, one of them is listening more and shutting my mouth up, that will be very hard though.

I agree 2009 was really tough for most of us, but then I want believe that we all conquered it and with grace.

My fears in life include having a sick loved one or losing them, but then, they're facts of life and the sooner we accept them the better we are able to manage it.

I hope 2010 will be kinder to all of us. And well, we can live life one lick at a time too! ;)

Happy Monday to you and thank so much for joining this week.

P.S. I was on a long vacation too and now I'm still trying to convince myself that work is fun! LOL

Janis said...

You have a good handle on the realities of life...it is good to take it one day at a time and keep the faith. Life can be cruel at times, I know first hand about dementia..it is such a horrible disease and so very sad to witness. Guess what it comes down to is...count our blessings everyday and embrace and try to enjoy each moment. Life is to short! Thanks for sharing Hula and its good to see you back.

The Church Lady said...

We all need to ask ourselves when we encounter difficulty in our lives, "Can I manage this just for today?" And try not to look to far into the future. May the Lord give us strength one day at a time.

Thanks for sharing and best wishes to you for a good year!

Pamela said...

for someone who needed some inspiration, I think you developed a great post.

My SIL has first stage alzheimers. She is only 60. we've been heartbroken -- and we are her only support system. Her sons have been only there for moments of time. (She also has a tumor in her chest and surgery this week- so that one is heavy on us, too)

The older I get it seems every year is double drama. deep breaths... just take deep breaths. And try to go with the flow.

Anonymous said...

What a beautiful post.
Health issues are always ones that we approach delicately. We have to prepare ourselves, but don't want to.
As for the empty nester's pool...come on in, the water's great. You'll have a life now and your daughter will still share hers with you. The mom/daughter relationship becomes extra special once she's an adult.
Happy New Year Hulagirl!!
Oh yeah...I found some of your brain on my porch, scooped it up and served it on toast...better than Marmite.

oreneta said...

A few pictures along the way would be a very very very good thing! Hope 2010 is gentler for you too.

Lil Mouse said...

I definitely dont have what it takes to run, I'm glad you can keep it up!

Sayre said...

I'm sorry to hear what you're going through with your Papa T. My MIL is in the same boat and it's getting harder to deal with. My husband and I spent yesterday cleaning their house, which was filthy. Made him sad because he remembers her as being such a clean freak and her kitchen was always pristine. Now, well, we'll just say it's not.

This was a beautiful post. Thanks for sharing.

Kim said...

I've heard many people say they are so glad 2009 is over, so you are not alone there. My hub and I had some parental challenges for 7 years, but the last two years have been very good. I figure I'm due 5more before anything else rocks my world -- 7 years of famine, 7 years of plenty, right? We'll see.
Two of my mottos? "Maintain an even strain" and "This too shall pass." Relationships are the only thing we can take with us.

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