Sunday, January 17, 2010

Proof We Are Not Pretentious People

We really know how to make people feel welcome in our home. Friday night, janjanmom and her lovely youngin's came by to bring me a cake the eldest had made that day. Look! Isn't it cute?

Let's not talk about how fast it took me to eat it once I got over cutting into the lovely decorations. Thank goodness we got the TV hooked up in front of the treadmill. Otherwise, it would have been a weekend of staring at that Norman Rockwell print.

Anyway, I was giving janjanmom a tour of the new house, and I was all blah blah new lighting this and yak yak counter tops that. I walked into the dining room to show her the cute little Hula Girl napkins Teen Angel got me for Christmas when I stepped in the biggest dog turd ever. It appears the dog had NOT endured my marathon trip to the grocery store and the beauty shop Friday as well as I had thought and he had pooped in the dining room. To make matters worse, I accidentally sent some of it rolling underneath the hutch, where it now sits waiting for me to find the yardstick to fish it out from under there. Nice. I'm sure she failed to notice much of anything else on the tour because her head was probably screaming, "She had dog poop in her dining room!" the whole time.

Now, fortunately janjanmom is a down to earth, understanding person who has three children and a big dog, so she's dealt with a little poop in her time. However, that doesn't make me feel any less embarrassed about the whole thing. It will give us a good laugh in the coming years. When we're old, wearing gold shoes and playing Bingo, she can lean over to me and cackle, "Hey, remember that time the dog crapped in your dining room and you kicked that turd under the hutch?" We'll laugh and wheeze and wonder out loud why the kids don't come to see us more often.

In the meantime, please know dear readers that you are welcome in my home anytime and you definitely won't have to worry about using the right fork or a tea towel between dinner courses. You might however, want to watch where you step. Now, about that yardstick.......


Jason, as himself said...

Ha! Good story. I just hate stepping in poop. At least you were weren't barefoot, right? Right?

Janjanmom didn't even think twice about it, I'm sure.

I'll be over for my tour tomorrow.

oreneta said...

Lovely start to the day! That was really very funny. I was snorting and cackling to myself as I read it and Eldest had to come out and see if I was I had to read it to her, and that was even funnier. What is it about reading funny things aloud that makes them so much more outrageously funny?

The Church Lady said...

Thanks for th e chuckle this morning! I can only imagine!

Louisiana Belle said...

That seriously made me LOL! My dogs are usually pretty good, but there are those times...I have a chihuahua that poops in the dining room and the other chihuahua poops right in front of the toilet, which is pretty dang convenient. :)

karisma said...

Haha! Well at least it gave you something to blog about! The last time one of our dogs pooped in the house was four years ago when Bella was a puppy..that was the last time she got to stay in the house! Oh Im so mean but she chose to do it behind the wall unit and while I could smell it I could not find it. Yuck! Needless to say all our dogs live outside! They come in sometimes for a little but not long enough to poop!

J.G. said...

I bet everyone has a good dog poop story or two in their memories. Now you've got yours.

Oh, and remind me never to borrow your yardstick.

janjanmom said...

What I was really thinking was, "Damn, what a great blog post! I wish it was mine!"

That was a cute cake, thanks for showcasing it. She will be so proud to have it star in a blogpost about dog poop!! I don't think they even knew-they were too enthralled with a certain tiny treat maker!!

Thanks for the tour and letting me see the B.A.C.